Ok, now that your New Years resolution is over (oh I’m sorry, I meant, “going strong” …either way) I have a question about your efforts. Later, I will ask a question of which I really don’t know the answer. I know, you come to this site to be fed on relational tidbits and truths that fly in the face of how most people live and yet make perfect sense. However, I really don’t know the answer to a question I will ask later and wonder what others think.
Back to resolutions (I swear I would post this in July. I AM NOT being topical or seasonal…on purpose at least). Anyhow, whether it be a resolution or just something you’re trying to do to better yourself, where is your focus? In or Out? Do you try to eliminate something or are you adding something? Further, if you are adding “exercise” I take it as actually eliminating weight or risk of illness etc.
Allow me to clarify. Are you taking yourself, just as you are, and trying to add to the rest of the world by being more loving, serving others, helping the helpless (or anyone else for that matter)? Or, are you trying to better yourself…for yourself. Yes, yes yes if you are not happy with you or if you improve you and are successful you will be better equipped to help others…I get that. However, what is the first function of your resolution or change? Is it focused inward or outward?
If you answered honestly and it was “inward” I would then ask why? I’m not saying it’s wrong, just asking why? I would say that there is a large population (Christians mostly) who are still trying to qualify (for lack of a better word) for God’s love or approval. You, we, are trying to be more Godly by sinning less. On the surface there doesn’t seem to be anything wrong with that but is it the most pragmatic? Further, I would ask, sinning less in order to??? Look like a better person/Christian? Have others think more highly of us? Want to be more like us? Is it really about others (loving and serving) or is it just about you?
On the other hand, if your focus is outward (being more loving, forgiving, kind, serving, etc.) you can do that for the same selfish reasons but I think that occurs far less and at least blesses others in the process. Plus, one act of love can change a life. One month without chocolate, or beer, or caffeine, or with exercise…whatever, can go right down the crapper with a resumption of previous patterns. I contend we need to look more outward and less inward. Yes, you can and should do both. I simply feel that most people look inward way too much and miss the needs of those around them far too often.
Christians are taught to live a life beyond reproach, to be blameless and not to be a hypocrite. I would ask again, what comes to mind when you read this? Things you do that you feel you shouldn’t do or ways to love that you haven’t? Are you trying to become “that person.” You know, we hear about them, maybe have even met one. We imagine ourselves as that person, we may even know someone like “that person.” They are nearly sinless, they have it all. Not only do they sin very little but they love very much. They are not puffed up with pride but are quite humble and meek. My question (of which I have no firm answer) is this, if that person exists, in our culture today would that person cause others to try to be like them? I wonder if the environment in our culture would see this person as aloof and detached, alienated and professing to be superior. They would be, at least in the minds of others, be torn to shreds and not respected. I can imagine such quotes as, “Yeah, they seem to be genuine but I know they must have skeletons in their closet.”, or “They put up a good front but you know they have some weird perversion.” We, as a culture no longer value and try to emulate success but rather begrudge it and try to tear it down.
If you are the type of Christian that says, “We need to stand out in this sinful world as one who is different (implying a lack of sin)” I think you are missing it. I would counter by saying, “You are never going to be all that sinless, you will probably become better at hiding sin, and no one will want to be like you because you seem to only care about you and not the needs of others.” Further, even if you are successful they will try to tear you down anyhow.
On the other hand, what if we took a life of trying to be like Christ to mean a life full of loving and serving others, meeting others needs and humbling ourselves? Rather than the primary focus being getting rid of sin it was adding acts of love and Christlike sacrifice and humility. People would still try to tear you down but they would look foolish. Look at 1Peter 3: 13 Who is going to harm you if you are eager to do good? 14 But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. “Do not fear their threats; do not be frightened.” 15 But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, 16 keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander.
Again, and in conclusion, I am not saying to wallow in your sin and to not try to get rid of it. But even then what sin comes to mind? Sin that makes you look like a “bad Christian” or sin that reveals you are far too consumed with yourself and not the needs of others? Yes, sin less and love more is the answer. I am just advocating loving more as a primary focus and ridding bad habits as a secondary motivation to be more like Christ.