So, for the first time in 2+ years I have gotten sick. Nothing too bad but more fluid has come out of my nose and eyes in the last 3 days than I could have every possibly imagine. Thus, I had the idea to make a list of the worst sicks. These are NOT in any specific order but as they come to my mind. Some are very serious and some are most situational. The ones in bold I have experienced.
- The elementary school throw up in class in front of everyone.
- Shingles
- Diabetes
- Cancer
- Pumpkin Head
- Auto immune diseases (Hashimoto’s)
- Stomach flu/food poisoning on an international flight throwing up 5x between New York and Budapest
- Dengue fever
- Other fevers
- Migraine headaches
- Other headaches (I don’t get them so a little one feels like a lot)
- Throwing up in general
- Diarrhea
- Simultaneous throw up and diarrhea
- Spontaneous human combustion (more of a condition than an illness but still)
- Acne
- AIDS
- A fib
- Arthritis
- Osgood Slaughters
- Dementia/Alzheimer’s
- ALS
- Lyme’s disease
- Pulling 9 ticks off of you in one year so you don’t get Lyme’s
- Rabies
- Sunburn so bad that even though you put tons of aloe on you eventually just peel in bigger sheets like a froot roll up
- Addiction
- Apnea
- Alopecia (for the record I spelled it right the first time)
- Agent orange
- Why are there so many “A” conditions/sicknesses
- Ringworm
- Fever
- Gluten exposure when you’re not Celiac but gluten averse
- Celiac’s
- Anxiety
- Low level hypochondria thinking that anything out of the ordinary might just be any of the above conditions
- Smelly toots (Rachel forbids any of us from saying that “F” word)
- Tapeworm
- Measles
- Polio
- Polo (being a douche and wearing Polo clothes AND cologne incessantly)
- Allergies
- Mumps
- Chickenpox
- Bi-polar condition
- Mental illness in general
- The flu
- Obsessive Compulsive Disorder
That’s it, that’s the list. What did I leave off that you’ve had to endure?