It’s a big world. In it are all sorts of problems. The biggest problem of our day? Oh, it’s hard to say. Frankly, I’m not even going there (insert many examples here). Granted the biggest problem facing you today is…your problem. If you have been reading anything I’ve written you’ve probably picked up on the fact that I firmly believe that we all have stories and are all facing a struggle of some kind. I do, we are, and we do need a lot more love and a lot less judgement.
That being said, just about everything I write and believe in is firmly rooted in one common problem. It is the problem that all generations have faced…and I mean all generations of all time. Not only that, it is the first problem man ever faced. For all of you smart Christians out there who are nodding your head and saying, “sin” and getting ready to move away from this page hold on…hold on. It is not sin. Sin is AN early problem but not the earliest problem man faced.
The first problem man (mankind…peoplekind…personkind……whatevvvver. Sorry, not feeling the PC vibe today) faced is the same one that everyone faces in all parts of the world for all time is…being alone. We were built to be in relationships. We were built to be social creatures and in relationship with one another. Being alone is terrible. Think about it, it is used as a punishment (ever hear of solitary confinement?). It can drive you crazy (literally), it can actually kill you.
Some of you “solid devout” Christians will tell me that you have your Jesus and that’s all you need. Well, when I said it was a problem that preceded sin I meant it. Adam was lonely before the fall. God created Adam (oh…if you don’t believe in the bible or the 7 day creation just go ahead and read this for its figurative value) and it was NOT good…because he was alone (lonely). Mind you, he had a walking talking relationship with God the Father at this point. Now, how did God solved this problem? Did He spend more time with Adam? No. Adam already had a job, a great place to live, and the world at his fingertips. God solved this problem with Eve…a relationship. So, if you’re saying that you don’t need anyone else, you are saying that you are better than a pre-fallen Adam. I’m saying, no, you’re not.
Allow me to go one step further. God did this because we were created to be in a relationship with Him. That relationship was broken by sin. That sin was paid for by Jesus dying on the cross (this might seem overly simple or preachy, assuming, who knows…it’s not the focus of this post). God created us to be in a relationship with Him, so much so that He gave His only Son. We can do no more Godly thing than to help others not feel alone by being in a good/solid relationship with them.
I hear churches talk about doing outreach and I mourn the lonely within their very congregation. I get frustrated that people are alone in the house nearest a church and yet people drive past them every Sunday (sometimes Wednesdays too). We worry about our “witness” and don’t want to appear like we sin a lot and focus everything on ourselves all the while not realizing how lonely are most people in our lives. We try so hard and spend many hours on church events when simply recognizing the people already in your midst (in and more importantly outside of your church) would go much much farther.
If you are not Christian you’re not absolved from this either. You have friends and wonder why they are so moody, so bitter, so angry all the time. You look at your loved ones and wonder why they’ve “changed”. We try to fix everybody in our world (especially ourselves) and get frustrated when it doesn’t work. We look at our spouses and think that they are out of their minds and asking the world of us.
Truth is, everyone, everywhere struggles with being alone. “But” you say “you are surrounded by people all the time and have a huge family. How can you be alone?” Very often we feel more alone in relationships than outside of them. That is the basis for what I do. I desperately want people to realize that they are not alone, that you are not alone. I want to equip people with the skills to build relationships and have them be strong and healthy. I want everyone to realize that most people feel alone, more often than not, and it doesn’t need to be that way. Lastly, I want everyone to know that you can change the lives of those around you by simply checking in and helping people not feel alone.
Being alone? The feeling has been around forever. The solution? Relationships, good healthy relationships. Let’s start them, fix them, move them further and deeper, by simply helping people not be…alone.