“Life is too boring”…said no one over 18, ever. No, it’s either fast paced and frenetic or fast paced and manic if not panic riddled. Maybe it does slow down for the more senior of our citizens but in most cases they seem to be a busy bunch. However, what if you could add something to make it quite a bit more interesting? May I suggest to you the “Chance Card” of life? Yes, heavily if not trademark illegally borrowing from the board game Monopoly, it is similar to the one found at the center of many a board game. This one is different though. It is much more fluid. It is much much more interesting. It is much much much more unrealistic.
Imagine, if you will, that each day (week, month, insert period of time here) you got to draw a card that gave you an ability or special insight for the day (period of time). What type of ability or insight you say? Allow me…
Ten Minute Rewind – at any moment you may play this card and you will immediately rewind your life 10 minutes. Do you play it after something great has happened (to relive the moment) or save it and play it after a huge mistake to fix said mistake? Be careful, you don’t want to hold onto it too long and relive a great brushing of the teeth before bed.
The Identifier – oooooh be careful with this one. As you play this card you simply ask the question, “Who has ever (will ever) xyz?” Then, for the rest of the day (time period) anyone that has done or will do whatever your question was has a bouncing arrow above their head. Topics may include but are certainly not limited to: cheated on a spouse, murdered someone, given their life to Christ, been naked in public, done drugs, given a lot (or nothing) to charity, thinks you are xyz, would be willing to…whatever. The possibilities are endless, and often quite frightening.
The DVD of Life – This one can be quite boring but every once in a while…oh boy! You identify one person and at that point you receive a DVD (or video file for your computer or phone) a weeks worth of their life. Every minute of every day is recorded.
The Age Gun – This one was invented with my best friend in high school Dan Leppold. You simply point this gun at someone and adjust the gun for the time period desired and BLAM, you get to see what they will (or did) look like. They are not aware of it nor do they change in any way. This is perfect for choosing a spouse or prospective date, wondering how your kids will turn out, seeing what your parents or grandparents looked like “back in the day.” The possibilities are endless.
The Inner Monologue Amplifier – Again, I’d be rather careful with this one. As you engage the amplifier you are able to hear what the person is thinking (or saying to themselves…you know, the inner monologue). A perfect way to win a negotiation. A scary way to ask someone out. A potentially terrifying way to get some truth out of a loved one or spouse. Again, I’d be really careful with this one.
The Pause – Just as it sounds. For 30 minutes you can pause your life and operate outside of it for 30 minutes. Need a nap? Need to get caught up on some things? Perhaps you just want to see what’s waiting for you inside that meeting room you were summoned to? Everything freezes except for you. Be careful though, if the time runs out you don’t want to be somewhere you’re not supposed to be as things will automatically resume after the time is up.
The Super Power of the Day – With this one you simply engage the mechanism and voila! You have a super power. However, you don’t get to pick and choose what super power it is and please please remember, you are still you. You are not a super hero. So, if it’s the ability to fly and you go willy nilly flying all over the place you will probably have some problems with some air traffic controllers if not military drones (insert current arguments for and against here). This may produce many more problems than one would think.
The True Statistic Reader – Perhaps a bit of a macro version of “The Identifier.” Throughout the time period you will have the ability to ask a question and immediately that answer is revealed to you. The question has to be statistic or survey related. Why not just google (or “bing” I suppose) the same thing? For this one, you receive the completely accurate and honest answer with absolutely no bias or margin of error.
The Truth Behind Video – Ahhhh yes, curl up on a Saturday night and see what really happened to JFK. Check out if we did really land on the moon. Imagine a Friday night with some popcorn and the real details behind UFO’s. Maybe you just have to know more about what happened in the life of Anna Nicole Smith/Lyndsay Lohan/Michael Jackson/Brittany Spears/Tupac/Elvis (a given) or whoever. Maybe it’s less famous person related and more about someone you know and love. You could find out what really happened when dad, or mom, or (whatever)…
The Food Fixer – Have you ever cooked something and it just didn’t turn out the way it should have? Maybe you were excited about what you ordered at a restaurant and then completely let down when the food came? This one if for you. You simply play the “food fixer” and your food is “fixed” and as a bonus, you get a detailed report on how to make it better next time (add more salt, try this spice, use a brine, etc.).
The Chore Remover – For the period of time, whatever chore you choose is removed from your burden. It is done for you instantly. Laundry? Cutting the grass? Cleaning? Washing the car? Whatever.
These are just the ones I have come up with over the years. Yes, with most you will probably end up with some very unintended consequences. Perhaps you know of some that I’ve missed. Which ones would you want to get first and how would you use them? Which ones would you never want to get or would you never use if you did get them? Let all of us know you would engage the Chance Card of Life in your life!