One step at a time. Every little bit counts. The journey of a thousand miles starts with one step. It’s not the destination it’s the dedication. Beginning is half done. It’s not how you start but how you finish. There are no stupid questions, just stupid people that ask questions when you’re just trying to get out of the meeting. Etc Etc Etc.
Nope, not rockin’ the cliche’ train today. Just dropping you a quick note to let you know that the family is taking the next step today in our grieving process. This is our first Monday of 10 where we will be attending the Highmark Caring Place. I’ve written about it before but it is group therapy for the whole family broken down into adults and the kids within their respective age groups. Both adults and kids are further (most often) broken into groups of similar loss (sibling vs. parent, child vs. spouse). We went to the orientation about a month ago and were very encouraged. Today, we start.
I have no idea what, emotionally, lies ahead. It is very much shared experience and emotionally based group therapy which I believe to be most effective. We will see. Bella is ready to hug…and be hugged, but not so excited to share what’s inside…and that is more than ok we’ve assured her. In fact, the number one rule there is the “I pass” rule. You can say, “I pass” at any time you’d like. I, of course, first thought she was saying, “eye pass” which made no sense to me. Joe is pensive about his group. He is, rightfully, concerned whether he will be the youngest of the older kids or (blech) oldest of younger (they typically break them into 10 – 12 year olds and 13 – 15 or so). He is also wise enough to wonder what emotions may come out but is more than willing and even a bit looking forward to it. I am looking forward to it and Rachel knows it to be necessary and vital to healing and moving forward.
There are some other steps I/we are taking to further our grief process. I have written about most, if not all of them before. I have some new ones cooking up in my mind that I will be sharing if I can confirm that they are good and productive in the healing process. We are ok.
A great friend of mine asked me yesterday how I was to which I replied, “Sunday mornings are the best. When I get here I am excited and ready to worship.” He looked sad at my response and said, “You make the rest of your week sound like it’s really hard.” I told him that yeah, it can be…it is. It’s ok, it’s just hard. There’s lots of great (not just good) things and very few bad things…but it’s just hard, emotionally. It’s very hard to express but that’s how it is…for me. So, I take the next step.
What about you (you knew that was coming)? What’s your next step? Maybe just reading this was all you could do today, that’s cool. Great job. If you don’t know where to go try this page out but make sure to click on all of the links on the page. Of all of my posts this has probably the most comprehensive collection of comfort tips/instructions/tools of any.
We will gladly be praying for you and gratefully accept your prayers as well. We shall see…